Crying and Crystals

I’ve always been interested in crystals and stones because, well, they’re beautiful and I’m a geology nut, but also because of their natural healing properties for living things. If you haven’t read it yet, I recently had my first selenite wand experience and WOW. I couldn’t have made it up if I tried.

So under the advice and guidance of my local wizard (lol no just a healer) I’ve been healing with chakra stones and some others.

Here’s my arsenal:

Chakras: 

  • Root – Red Jasper
  • Sacral – Carnelian
  • Solar Plexus – Citrine
  • Heart – Adventurine
  • Throat – Sodalite
  • Third Eye – Amethyst
  • Crown – Clear Quartz

Others: 

  • Tree Agate
  • Black Tourmaline
  • Angelite
  • Selenite

Something “weird” that happens to me when I use my crystals for healing (rather than just holding on to them) is that I cry. Not sad tears, not angry tears, but happy, relieved tears. I called my guy and he said it’s totally normal, it’s just the kind of person I am. (I believe he was referring to me being highly sensitive but I’m not sure). Tears just come out, unforced, which is weird for me, and my spirit is lifted and happy. I rarely ever describe myself as happy or cry, which now that I think about it seems a little contradicting. It’s almost addicting to feel this good. I’m glad it’s stones and crystals rather than meth lol.

There’s absolutely no doubt in my mind that we are connected to the earth, so of course we are connected to crystals and stones. Shit, did you know ice is a mineral? Geologists argue about it, but it has all 5 of the characteristics that make up a mineral. And what are we made of? WATER. Like, come on. I don’t see how some people refuse to connect the dots and take the information laid out in front of them.

Giada

My First Selenite Wand Experience

“Holy shit,” I mumbled as my body started to tingle. When the shop owner was detecting my negative energy on his own I was fine, but when I took the selenite wand into my own hands I immediately felt it sucking the badness out of me; my left hand and right shoulder to be exact.

My legs started to give in and blood felt like it was rushing to my head. I became hyper-aware of how my body was feeling and all I could say was, “I’m going to pass out. I’m going to pass out.” All because I was holding a selenite wand in my hands.

“Just hang on a little longer,” The shopkeeper, Paul, said to me. Eyes wide, I obviously wanted to shove it back into his hands, but I was frozen in an equal mixture of terror and amazement. I didn’t expect this to happen; not because I don’t believe in “this stuff” but because I know some practices are questionable. I wasn’t sure what I expected, but that was not it.

After the cleansing was over and I settled down a little, my recent behaviours started to make more sense to me. When I was in the shop holding the stones that I wanted, all of a sudden I started to get a panic attack (which isn’t rare for me) and I wanted to flee the store. I’m convinced that the negative energy sensed what was coming for it and tried to get me, and therefore it, out of “harms” way.

When running the wand over me, he stopped at my left palm.

“Is that a real tattoo?” He asked in regards to my faded “A”.

“Yeah, I have 3.” Which I’m now realizing isn’t even true, I have 4.

He keeps going along my wingspan, passing my bee tattoo, and stops at my third, my poodle.

“There’s some right here, too.” Paul said, wand hovering.

“My poodle?” I joked, frowning.

“No, no,” He started, “It’s not the tattoo itself, the symbol, or the meaning. For some reason, bad energy just likes to go to them.”

He also detected my stomach problems with the wand, which I had never mentioned.

That’s when he passed the wand on to me. I had watched the woman before me hold it and nothing happened to her. She was free of negative energy. After me my father held it and he too was free of negative energy. They’re very rare– 1/1,000.

I also learned that while empaths and sensitives are very similar, they are not the same.

At the end of my trip I got a sage mist, chakra stones (red jasper, sodalite, aventurine, carnelian, citrine, tree agate, and crystal quartz.), labradorite, selenite, angelite, amethyst, and black tourmaline. Paul cleansed my stones for me with selenite and my hand started shaking because of the stones vibrations.

This was one of the most unexplainable, spiritual things that have ever happened to me. I know it’s going to sound like reaching to most people, but I’m serious. None of this is fabricated– it’s my real life experience that happened to me about an hour ago.

And get this– Paul is a friggin engineer. Out of all of the people that could be into this, an ENGINEER. I love it.


Photo is from Poshmark

I Was Actually Happy: A Concert Story

Background info: I went to a concert in Dallas The headliner was Iann Dior, but Bernard Jabs and poorstacy played as well. I knew Bernard because him and Iann have a song, “Molly”, together and that was the first song I heard that got me listening to Iann more. However, I think I had heard of poorstacy but never listened to him. His set rocked my fucking world.

Part 2 background info: I hate crowds, I hate feeling unsafe, I hate not knowing where I am or who I’m around, and I hate being sweaty. Trolls: “Oh my God, then don’t go to concerts, idiot!” Shut up, troll, I love music.

Onto the story. First of all, poorstacy is the best performer I’ve ever seen hands down, and I’ve been to a lot of concerts. I wasn’t super stoked to see him at first, because I didn’t really know who he was, but I was utterly and pleasantly surprised. His music spoke to me on such a deep level that before this concert, only Linkin Park had reached. poorstacy reached the same level in one night as a band I’ve been listening to since birth and consistently have listened to in times of distress to desperately relate to someone. One night.

Something I’ve always struggled with as an INFJ is feeling like I belong anywhere and feeling like anybody in this world understands me. Until that night, I guess I only felt like Mike Shinoda and Chester Bennington did. Sadly, Mike would never notice me because he’s a star and Chester is… RIP. However, poorstacy literally spoke to us and was saying the most prophetic, loving shit—things that usually only I say or think—and was constantly trying to get closer to the fans even though his “guards” or bosses would tell him otherwise. He would stand amongst us, speak to us, tell us to really listen to the music. He didn’t put himself above us, he used his platform to ignite change in us.

His lyrics and passion hit me so hard I can’t even describe it. For those who know, I have panic disorder. So while I already hate crowds, feeling unsafe, and not knowing where I am or who I’m around, all of that is multiplied by a million because anything can set me off into having a panic attack. (Especially being hot and sweaty. Apparently since it’s a symptom of a panic attack, it can make you have one. Like, fuck me, right?) Keeping all of this in mind—I closed my eyes and just listened to the music. I was so… enveloped by my senses. No, I wasn’t on any drugs. It was literally the music. Only the music. It was crazy. I felt calm for once. Just listening to the music, hanging on every word, swaying.

At the end of the whole concert, I felt light as air. I wasn’t worried about a fucking thing. The night before the concert I was bawling my eyes out about starting my senior year in college and my panic attacks, but after the concert I didn’t give a FUCK about that. I could take on anything. School? Sure. Panic? Where? I was literally spinning with my arms out at one point, just smiling like I was in a tampon commercial.

Is this where the phrase “high on life” comes from? I mean, at risk of sounding like a meme…

My takeaway from that was that there are real people out there like me that understand me. I’m not alone. Also, the best weapon against panic attacks are endorphins? I need to find things that are actually fun and fulfilling to me. Sure, going out and shopping is fun, but it doesn’t fulfill me. I’m going to stop filling my life with empty happiness and start filling it with bliss.

Spring 2019 Semester Vent: Panic Attacks and Other Drama

God.

I don’t even know where to start.

I guess the crippling panic attacks are a good start off?

So a little background information– after a huge hurricane decimated where I was living in 2017, I moved 2 hours away to move in with my dad. Life altering already, right? So I tried online classes since I obviously wasn’t going to school on campus anymore, and failed because I’m just not the online class type. I worked and worked and said I’d go back to school, but I was stuck in this bubble of fear, comfortable where I was. I didn’t want to go back to where I was living before. It was crazy, uncontrollable, and unstructured. I liked my peace and quiet working for $8/h at a coffee shop. I was engaged. Got a dog who I adore. I was happy.

Finally, a year and a half later, I found myself back at school because “it’s the right thing to do” and whatever. “It’ll be easy,” I thought, since I went there for 2 years already. *Record scratch* “Wow, I was fucking wrong,” I thought, 2 weeks later. Being in that hell hole away from the life I had started in my quiet little town was killing me. I was alone, stressed, and miserable. The only good thing about my dorm was that I didn’t have a roommate bothering me and I could decorate however I wanted to. I was taking 6 or 7 classes, wasn’t working so I didn’t have any money, and once again, was alone. I’m introverted and very picky, so reading this and being like, “Smh, dumb, why didn’t you just ~make friends~,” is pointless. I don’t wanna; that’s why.

So I think it was the first day of trigonometry that I got my first panic attack of the semester. I didn’t realize it at first because I thought my body was trying to make me faint, which in hindsight probably IS what was happening. Naturally, I called my mom: “Hey, I think I keep trying to faint. What do I do? Is that normal? I’m not dehydrated.” I don’t remember the whole conversation, but I ended up being fine, I think. Ah yes, I was shaken and called my old, local friend who I currently don’t speak to anymore, lol. So it was a great first day, right? It only got worse.

Pretty soon, I was textbook panic disorder. Emergency room with my heart rate at 150 in March, avoiding situations that would give me panic attacks (Sadly, class. *waves* Hi parents.), mild agoraphobia, etc. My first really bad panic attack happened in February and I was shaking– more like thrashing my body– uncontrollably and puking for three hours. I got extremely sick around April and my hypochondriac ass got panic attacks on top of that because obviously I’m fucking dying if I’m that sick. Not just sick, but sick and dying. For some reason I’m still avoiding therapy, too.

Flew to Vegas in the middle of this somehow, lol.

I don’t want to spill all the beans because I respect myself a liiittttttttle bit, but jeez I’m so stupid sometimes!!

Everybody: “No, Jaedyn.”

Jaedyn: *Loses hearing and judgement*

If it weren’t for my ONE friend, I probably would’ve died. I purposely have not looked up what the hell would’ve happened to me the day my heart rate was 150, but if I were truly all alone, truly friendless, maybe I would’ve died. I don’t know. I don’t wanna know. But- it’s a scary thought.

Usually I’m a straight-A student. Always have been, and I thought I always would be, but panic disorder has been one of the hardest blocks in my life so far. It’s truly crippling and terrifying. I bawl my eyes out in fear of it. I’m so scared to go back to school next semester. I’ve been crying more and more lately in preparation, I guess. Last semester I did alright, passed, but could’ve done better. “Hey at least you didn’t flunk out of school because of it,” yeah yeah but I have standards for myself. It’s hard to do amazing in a class when you avoid it.

Overall, this is a vent, a rant, and advice obviously doesn’t help me or I’d be fine. I guess I wanted to get this out for me, and also share this in case someone else with panic disorder reads this. It sucks, it really does, but I’m better than I was in the beginning.

Something that really helped me was joining the panic disorder subreddit. Knowing that there are other people that go through what I do, and that some of those people are almost “out” of it, made me feel less alone and more hopeful. If you’re going through this and need someone to relate to or, hopefully in the future lend advice, feel free to comment on this. According to a random Google search, panic disorder affects 2-3% of Americans. So while we’re few and far between, we should help each other when we can.

Alright, try not to judge me too harshly for this post.

Giada

The End of A Chapter

There were 2 lines in this that struck me HARD. Wow. So impressed.

emspiration.net

The Bayou Farm Adventure chapter is officially closed. I actually signed the sale a few weeks ago. It just took a long time to sink in that it’s not mine any more. And that I won’t likely ever realize all those dreams I had attached so thoroughly to the most beautiful piece of land I will likely ever be able to call all mine. I have faith one day all of this will hurt less. But, alas, that day remains elusive. And while I am grateful for al the ways God showed up for Us in those moments & I am enjoying the twists & turns Life has surprised me with, there is just something so unsettling about being ripped- mid dream- from a Life you are enjoying so very much- and being thrown into a another Life, nothing like the one you worked so hard to create. It does…

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Can I Clean My Beauty Blender in the Microwave?

So there’s this trend going around where beauty gurus are putting their makeup sponges in a cup of soapy water and microwaving it for 1 minute to clean it. I’m here to put my beloved beauty blender on the line to prove if this works or not with a science experiment.

Continue reading “Can I Clean My Beauty Blender in the Microwave?”

Is AMC Premiere Worth $15?

There are 2 types of basic reward memberships for AMC Theaters; Insider and Premiere. While Insider is free, Premiere costs $15 a year. While that may be an instant turn off to any novice penny-pincher, I’m here to tell you that with this membership, not only are there ample opportunities to make your money back, but loads of savings as well. Why listen to me? I sell these and see the savings Premiere customers rack up on a daily basis.

Continue reading “Is AMC Premiere Worth $15?”

Working Where You’re a Consumer

Hey everyone!

Today I’m going over working where you buy a lot from. Whether this be a clothing store, fast food place, coffee shop, etc. there are pros and cons based on your spending habits.

This is a piece where I’ll be talking a lot about my personal experience opposed to hard facts. Everybody’s experiences are different, so don’t take my advice as the end all be all!

My goal is to show you how different jobs offer different benefits and effect your spending in different ways.

Will Working Here Increase or Decrease My Spending?

Before working somewhere you should see what the benefits are like. For example, Kohl’s associates get 15% off of everything and once in a while (like for the event Friends and Family) it will increase to 20% or 25%. On the other hand, Dunkin’ Donuts employees receive free beverages while working.

Out these two places I’ve worked, I’ve spent SO MUCH MORE MONEY at Kohl’s because I get nice clothes for cheap. I honestly didn’t even shop at Kohl’s before I worked there. However, I get coffee from Dunkin’ Donuts or Starbucks mostly every day, so working there saved me about $4 a day or almost $30 a week!

There are also places I’ve worked like AMC where it doesn’t increase or decrease my spending, but overall, it decreases it. I’m not a movie person (yes I know it’s ironic) so I don’t see movies a lot. However, if I do want to see a movie, it’s free. Sometimes we even have early employee showings! So while I don’t spend money at movie theatres as much as coffee shops, when I do I save a lot of money. (~$10 a ticket around prime time and I can have 2 people with me so ~$30).

Will I Get Sick of This Place?

Using my working experience as an example again; like I said, I’m not a movie person, but now I’m really not a movie person because I don’t want to spend hours where I work. Even if I want to see a movie, I’ll usually procrastinate until I have at least 2 days where I don’t work so I don’t feel like I’m working while I watch a movie.

However, I never got sick of Dunkin’ Donut’s coffee. Yes, sometimes I still went to Starbucks and certain drinks lost their charm, but I always made myself multiple drinks while I was working and I still go there now that I don’t work there.

Lastly, Kohl’s is always changing because of the merchandise always changing, so while I don’t like to visit the store on my free time, there’s at least new things to shop through (and I love to shop!).

Learning Behind the Scenes

The best thing, hands down, about working where you’re a consumer is learning all of the behind the scenes tricks (so I can post them for you, haha).

Learning things as an employee instead of a customer will always be more thorough and enlightening. The customer asks the employee questions, not the other way around, right?

You know for sure if you’re getting hoed at other establishments; for example if your coffee is way more expensive for some reason, or if your coupon didn’t go through.

Knowing the Coupon Days and Discounts

Just for starters: if you have a Kohl’s charge card and there are no coupons out you can request a scratch off coupon, movies are $5 all day if you have a Stubs card at AMC on Tuesday, and it’s worth it to have a Dunkin Donut’s rewards card if you spend money there anyways. I’ll do individual posts and link them here when they’re done!

Most places offer student, senior, or military discounts even if they’re not advertised, or at least have certain days for them. For example, Dunkin’ Donut’s has a senior discount and AMC has a student, senior, child, and military discount on tickets. There’s really no reason to ever pay full price for tickets. Check out my post on if AMC Premiere is worth $15.

Make Your Choice

When deciding to work at a place where you’re a customer, remember to really think about it and make sure it won’t ruin it for you. List the pros and cons and make the decision for yourself!

Xoxo,

Giada.

New Years Resolutions 2019

Hey everyone! 2018 was a pretty rough, self-deprecating year for me. 2019 looks like a beacon of hope to me right now– an out, a start-over, a refresh button.

My goals, at the root, attempt to remedy problems I don’t mean to create because of my anxiety and fear. In 2018 I unintentionally let myself go because of the webs my anxious mind would spin.

If you need a refresher on goal-making check out my post: Setting F’ing SMART Locke Goals

My goals are focused on school, money, and anxious habits. I’m doing a lot of damage control from 2018!

2019 New Years Resolutions

  1. Stop being such a pushover
  2. Grab life by the balls and get what I want from it
  3. Get as close to graduating as the year allows
    • Take at least 1 summer class
    • Stay in school all year
    • Have a work/school mentality
  4. Be gluten free
  5. Get my savings account to $5,000
  6. Celebrate my 20th birthday
  7. Have 100 total sales for my shop
  8. Be patient

If you want to share some of your goals in the comments, go right ahead! I try to respond to every one of you.

Thanks for reading,

Giada

PetSmart and Petco Coupon Books Review (Not Sponsored)

This post is going to cover Petco’s Welcome to the Family coupon book, Petco’s Coupon Calendar, and PetSmart’s Puppy Guide. All of these opinions are my own and nothing here is sponsored.

Continue reading “PetSmart and Petco Coupon Books Review (Not Sponsored)”